I’ve been exploring the possibility of acquiring a handicapped van, so Ken and I can get out and enjoy some of the things we loved to do together before it got so hard for him to walk. When we go now, the trip ends up to be a trial for him or a trial for me. Either I need to hoist a wheel chair into the car and push it around, or he struggles with his walker.
Come to find out, there is a used car lot in Racine which handles such vehicles, and with our limited resources, the vehicle needs to be used. A new van runs about $60,000. Yow!
I drove one yesterday that was 13 years old, but it only had 37,000 miles on it. The price of $12,000 was reasonable, but I guess I don’t want to give up my little SUV that is only 7 years old with twice the mileage. I guess I’m not ready to make such a big decision. So, like Scarlet O’Hare in Gone With The Wind, “I will think about it tomorrow.”
Perhaps after mid-term grades are completed for my class, and after I go through my father’s funeral, my thinking will become more clear. Right now, I feel foggy, and I need time to figure out whether I want to go in debt further to buy a vehicle I need but I really don’t want. Buying such equipment is another admission Ken is failing,
I realize denial is part of my problem, but lack of money is another. I know I can overcome one problem, but I’m not sure of the other. One thing is for sure, though, through this MS journey, I have learned how to wait. I know the time will come when everything will seem right, and I’ll have the strength I need to make the right decision. Until that day comes, I’ll struggle along with what I have and be thankful.