Whoever came up the crazy idea that visualizing and audience naked when you have to speak must have been a man. It’s doing nothing to ease my anxieties this morning as I get myself ready for my first speaking “gig” in a very long time.
I’ve been invited to talk to a local Optimist club about my “Apple Pie and Strudel Girls” series of novels. I’m thankful for the opportunity, but I find myself fussing over the idea of standing in front of a group of strangers and talking. Even the fact that I speak in front on a classroom twice a week for two hours at a stretch, isn’t convincing me that I will be successful. This “gig” is scaring the beejeebers out of me.
I really don’t understand why having to speak for 15 minutes about something I love is having such an effect on me. After all, it should be a piece of cake, right? But my reaction to this situation gets me to thinking–why would a group of strangers be so intimidating?
After much soul searching, I have to confess the heart of my anxiety. I want them to LOVE me and my books.
I want to say just the right thing, so everyone will want my autograph at the book signing after the meeting.. . . or at the very least, I hope to build a fire under them to rush right out to one of the Internet sites or local book stores to buy them. Then I want them to tell all of their friends that they enjoyed the stories. Then I want to receive royalties. Then I want . . . you probably get the picture, right?